Tips, facts and resources for a more fulfilling life.

Making big changes in life is scary, difficult and overwhelming. But who’s to say it can’t also be exciting, freeing and a way to explore your life in a whole new way? Downsizing is a step people often take when they’re ready for a smaller living space, when making a distant relocation, or when they just want to simplify their homes and minimize their possessions.

Here are some downsizing tips that might make this transition a little easier:

• Document your possessions: Take photos of the things you won’t be keeping due to downsizing, or simply to maintain an easily accessible visual record of your valuables and memorabilia.
• Give yourself time to grieve: It’s okay to cry, long for and even have resistance to letting go. These belongings and the memories associated with them have filled your life with substance, color, and maybe are reminders of other big changes you’ve experienced. There is no “right” way to downsize and you’re not alone in this special kind of grief.
• Start a gratitude journal: Take a few moments each day (or week) to write about the things you most appreciated in your life. Maybe the things you journal about are the possessions you’ll have to re-home, or maybe it’s the people, places and memories associated with them.

The importance of social support in overall senior wellness.
So what is “social support?” Social support is any form of relationship you have with another person, creature, or community in your life. Studies show that people of all ages benefit from having quality social support systems, so much so that it can actually impact their physical and mental health if they lack this support. Stop and ask yourself: “Who are my healthy social supports and how can I continue to engage with them for mutual benefit?”

Facts to know about senior isolation:

• Social isolation in seniors can be as harmful to their mortality as smoking or high cholesterol.*
• Studies have shown that older adults who have a social support system have a lower mortality risk.*
• As individuals age, the quantity of social relationships may decrease, but the quality may increase and lead to greater life satisfaction.*

*Haber, D. (2016, p. 317) Health Promotion and Aging.Springer Publishing Company.

So what is “social support?” Social support is any form of relationship you have with another person, creature, or community in your life. Studies show that people of all ages benefit from having quality social support systems, so much so that it can actually impact their physical and mental health if they lack this support. Stop and ask yourself: “Who are my healthy social supports and how can I continue to engage with them for mutual benefit?”

Facts to know about senior isolation:

• Social isolation in seniors can be as harmful to their mortality as smoking or high cholesterol.*
• Studies have shown that older adults who have a social support system have a lower mortality risk.*
• As individuals age, the quantity of social relationships may decrease, but the quality may increase and lead to greater life satisfaction.*

*Haber, D. (2016, p. 317) Health Promotion and Aging.Springer Publishing Company.

Developmental psychology can be looked at from a variety of perspectives, but psychologist Erik Erikson looked at the “major tasks” of each life stage. The stage of life from 65+ years old is titled “Ego integrity vs. despair.”But what, you might ask, is ego integrity? Ego integrity is the ability to look at the choices and events of your life, and make meaning out of them. This usually includes accepting that even though there will always be challenges and mistakes in life, you can make the choice to consider your life well lived (Lally & Valentine, 2021).

Reminiscing on the past, as well as discussing important life events with loved ones, is one way you can work towards ego integrity. Plus, by making space in your life for spiritual wellness and exploration, you can understand how to make meaning of your life. Spirituality can be viewed as any sort of connection to things greater than yourself, and may or may not include religion. If you’d like to work toward “accomplishing” ego integrity, start by considering the following questions:

1. What things in my life have meant the most to me?
2. How have I changed and become more wise through my experiences?
3. What do I believe my overall purpose in life was?
4. Do I consider my life a life well lived?

Lally, M., & Valentine-French, S. (2021, August 2). 9.17: Erikson – integrity vs. despair. Lifespan Development A Psychological Perspective. Retrieved October 14, 2022, from https://opentextbooks.concordia.ca/lifespandevelopment/chapter/9-17-erikson-integrity-vs-despair/

Are you thinking about moving into assisted living or a senior living community? Maybe you’re already living in one or contracted to move. This process can be overwhelming and even feel lonely or isolating at times. However, living in some sort of assisted living/care facility is actually a common experience for nearly 1 million Americans. One report shows that nearly 810,000 people ages 65 and over live in some sort of senior living/assisted living community (Samuels, 2022). Here are the main benefits of moving to a senior living community (Senior Lifestyle, 2020):

• Nutritional support/focus
• A lower-maintenance lifestyle
• Personal care options that are more accessible
• Safety and security if you need support with mobility, health, or self-care
• Opportunities for healthy living (activities, programming, transportation, socialization)

Samuels, C. (2022, April 21). Assisted living statistics: Population & facilities in 2022. A Place for Mom. Retrieved October 14, 2022, from https://www.aplaceformom.com/caregiver-resources/articles/assisted-living-statistics

Senior Lifestyle. (2020, July 29). Top 7 benefits of retirement communities. Senior Lifestyle. Retrieved October 14, 2022, from https://www.seniorlifestyle.com/resources/blog/top-7-reasons-to-live-retirement-in-a-retirement-community/

Boundaries are an important way to achieve personal wellness and maintain healthy relationships. They’re defined as any limits or parameters that a person sets in a relationship with another person to show how they need or deserve to be treated. In other words, by setting boundaries with people you interact with or care for, you’re showing them how they can remain in a relationship with you in a healthy and fulfilling way. Some examples of healthy boundaries include:

• Saying no: Often, it can be difficult to say no to people you care about, especially if it’s something you’d really like to do for or with that person. However, we all have our limits, and can’t always say yes to everything that is asked of us. Think of this as budgeting your energy.
• Communicating things that have upset or hurt you: It can be extremely difficult to let someone know when they’ve said or done something that didn’t sit right with you. It’s common to be fearful of upsetting them, getting into a fight, or even potentially creating a major relationship rupture. But, if you don’t let people know that their actions or words didn’t reflect the way you want to be treated, then it might leave room for it to keep happening. It may also cause emotions to fester and resentment or other negative feelings to build up.

Are you someone who bounces back quickly after facing a challenge or upset in some way? Do you consider yourself tough, durable and determined? If any of these traits describe you, then you’re the definition of resilient. Resilience, in the mental health realm, means you have the ability to cope well with challenges you encounter, even if it takes some time to “bounce back.” Here are some ways to build your resiliency:

• Get support from others: Whether you seek help from a therapist, support group, or simply talk to a trusted friend or family member, social support is a major protective factor for any person dealing with difficult times.
• Follow your values: It’s not uncommon for individuals, couples, families, or even entire communities to band together via churches, faith groups, or other spiritual communities to be able to make meaning of tough times, and problem-solve how to get through them.
• Make your overall wellness a priority: Make sure you get enough sleep, adequate nutrition, support from others, participate in activities you enjoy, and give yourself grace and compassion that it’s okay to not be okay sometimes.

Do you feel frustrated, angry, or hurt when someone tries to treat you like you’re not an adult? Infantilization, or treating someone as though they’re an infant, is a harmful and negative pattern that often shows up for people when they’re older. Some may forget you’ve been autonomous and self-sufficient for many years. Here’s how to ensure people recognize and treat you as an adult:

• Set boundaries: The way people talk to you — their tone of voice, speed of speaking, and content you discuss — is a good indicator of how they see you. While it’s totally understandable if you need someone to speak slower or more loudly, automatically  assuming you need to be spoken to in a certain way is disrespectful.
• Have important conversations: Talk to people about the things you care about. It may be uncomfortable to discuss certain topics with people (death, sex, politics), but that doesn’t mean you should allow them to become taboo.
• Celebrate growing older: You have a lot of life experiences that the people in your life can benefit from hearing about. Don’t be afraid to celebrate your wisdom, strengths and talents with a neighbor, peer or younger person in your life.

The transition from summer to fall to winter can bring a mix of many emotions. If the holidays, winter, or the end of the year are a difficult time for you, consider the following:

• What do I love the most about this part of the year? Is it the weather, or the traditions/celebrations? Is it the fond memories of years past? Share these positive associations with someone you know and you might learn what they like best, too.
• What brings you grief now and in this season during years past? Is it the loss of loved ones? Celebrations that no longer feel the same or bring the same meaning? Is it from regrets or sadness from experiences that didn’t go as you’d hoped? Now ask yourself: What does this grief tell me? What does it want me to understand about myself, my relationships, my purpose in life, and how can I use that understanding to create positive experiences in the new year?

It’s okay to feel more than one emotion about the end of the year, the changing of the seasons, the closing of one chapter and the approach of a new one. You aren’t alone in any experience you’re having, but especially during this time of transition.

You might be anticipating making some changes later in life, including moving into an independent living senior community or moving in with a family member, and you might also be doing so with your spouse or partner. But if there’s a cognitive or physical health condition limiting one partner’s involvement in making these decisions and changes, the burden is much greater on the other partner.

You may be in the role of caregiver, while also needing extra support yourself. It’s possible to develop caregiver burnout because of the strain on your own personal resources. For example, caregivers who are burned out might get sick more often; they may have constant fatigue and heightened anxiety; they may be socially withdrawn or go through changes in appetite or weight. It’s important to understand that experiencing caregiver burnout isn’t a reflection of your love for the person you care for and it doesn’t make you a cold or bad person.

There are a few things that can help reduce the feelings of caregiver burnout or potentially serve as protective factors against developing burnout in the first place:

• Don’t forget about yourself, your needs and your limitations. It’s OK to set boundaries and ask for help from others whenever possible.
• Find someone you trust. Whether that’s a friend, family member, or professional, find someone to whom you can express your feelings and get support in the challenges of being a caregiver.
• Accept your feelings as valid. It’s easy to be hard on yourself when you face challenges or tough emotions while in your role as caregiver. But accepting your experience as valid can help avoid resentment or withdrawal.

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Memory is a capacity that’s fundamental to a successful and fulfilling human existence. Unfortunately, memory decline is a normal part of aging, and in some cases can become a barrier to safe and autonomous living. Here are tips the Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research (2021) recommends for maintaining and improving memory:

1. Include regular physical activity in your daily routine.
2. Stay mentally active, and engage in a variety of activities to challenge different parts of your brain.
3. Socialize regularly.
4. Get organized. This might include lists, digital organizers, and keeping your important items in a dedicated place (phone, keys, wallet, address book, etc).
5. Sleep well. This includes creating a bedtime routine and wake-up routine for yourself.
6. Eat healthy. Each person will have differing dietary needs and preferences. However, eating foods rich in vitamins and those with low-fat protein, and being careful not to consume too much alcohol, can all help strengthen memory and cognitive capabilities.
7. Manage chronic conditions. Work with your care team or doctor to know what chronic conditions might impact memory and other cognitive functioning.

As your loved one ages, you may become aware of more significant memory decline than is expected with aging. It will be important to find some sort of care and support system that can help monitor and keep them safe with programs and spaces designed for memory care.

Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research. (2021, March 10). Memory loss: 7 tips to improve your memory. Mayo Clinic. Retrieved November 14, 2022, from https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/healthy-aging/in-depth/memory-loss/art-20046518

In the most traditional sense, grief is the deep sorrow after the loss of a loved one or someone you know. There are many types of grief that someone can experience, from the death of a person, the loss of identity or security … or actually any sort of loss.

Following are some common types of grief that are part of the human experience:

• Normal grief: Moving toward the acceptance of a loss by experiencing some sort of physical, emotional, or spiritual pain for a limited period of time. It’s important to note that there’s no “right way” to experience “normal” grief.
• Anticipatory grief: When you know a loss is coming, whether because of terminal illness or even making a big life change, anticipatory grief is normal and expected.
• Disenfranchised grief: This occurs when someone experiences grief over a loss that is stigmatized (e.g., suicide, drug overdose, drunk driving) or considered insignificant by others (e.g., the death of someone who would be considered an acquaintance, but to whom you’re not personally close). These losses are just as important, and you should seek support and give yourself space to process through them, regardless of others’ perspectives.
• Traumatic grief: This may be the loss of a person suddenly or due to traumatic circumstances. It might also be a non-person loss that happens abruptly or with other traumatic circumstances (e.g., losing one’s home in a natural disaster).

The key advice for these types of grief is to give yourself the space to heal, be gentle with yourself, and get support wherever possible. No matter the circumstances, the person, possession, or experience that you’ve lost, you deserve time to grieve. Seeking understanding and meaning through grief management support groups and resources can help.

Better Place Forests. (2022, August 4). 7 common types of grief (with examples). Better Place Forests – Memorial Forests for a Better Resting Place. Retrieved November 14, 2022, from https://www.betterplaceforests.com/blog/articles/7-common-types-of-grief-with-examples

It’s important to acknowledge that every single person may have various challenges with mental health at different points in their lifetime. Even if someone has never before experienced anxiety, depression or other symptoms in the past, these issues can pop up later in life. They may be intensified for those managing chronic conditions, dealing with grief or loss, or going through changes in their relationships or upheaval in their lives. There are treatments and solutions to help, including many resources specifically for people who are in later life stages and the unique challenges they face.

Here are a few resources that might be very helpful for you or someone you know:

• The Administration on Aging provides resources to help with substance abuse and other mental health resources (including relevant research and programs).
• gov is a comprehensive governmental resource to support those with Alzheimer’s disease and their loved ones.
• The American Psychological Association is one of the leading accrediting and professional bodies for mental health. The following is a link to an article on Coping with Stress and Anxiety.
• The National Resource Center for Engaging Older Adults is an organization that provides publications, literature, programs, and other resources for older adults.

There’s no shortage of solid resources that can help you, your peers, and your loved ones stay engaged and get support for mental health at any age.